pat on the back

Day three of thirty and so far I am keeping to my vow.
Day 1: 30min went incredibly fast. Like a blink. I actually thought someone texted me when my cell buzzed as a timer.
Day 2: The cat (who was hiding under the bed when thought I closed out the animals) decided that my half lotus lap was the perfect spot for a curl up. I think she actually helped me through the 45 minute sit. I guess sangha can come in many shapes.


I am dealing with some doubt and insecurity about my path the last few days. It comes in many shapes. I was feeling like the 'weird' one today at work when talking about going on retreat, and a woowoo character on a show was being mocked about her meditation and yoga classes at Sedona. 
Am I just being one of those sad people who goes through divorce and 'turns to God'? That I need to find myself because my only identification was with my marriage?
I guess it just points to the similarity of human experience. That people who go through similar change seek similar medicine. And that my judgement of those people only points to my selfishness, and seperateness.
I just hope I am not losing myself further in my attempt to 'find' myself. I mean, it isn't like I went anywhere. I am here right now, perfect right now. Why am I seeking? I cannot be anything different than I am right now. So why the pit in my stomach?